And Now for Your Viewing Pleasure…

When I was a kid, my dad would always bring home pizza every Friday night after work.  We would stay up ‘til 1am watching old TV shows.  Anybody know what TV show Bob Denver starred in before “Gilligan’s Island”?  The old shows would start with the main characters doing a little commercial.  Each show had a special product that they would hock.  For George Burns and Gracie Allen it was Carnation Milk, Jack Benny was Jello, Ozzie and Harriett was Aunt Jemima Pancake Mix, Groucho Marx was Prom Shampoo, and even Yogi Bear hocked Kellogg’s Corn Flakes.  Anyway, they would finish up with their commercial and then they would say “and now for your viewing pleasure”.  Great now the program was starting!  That’s a good memory.

A lot of us guys have used the same phrase for the start of summer.  And now for your viewing pleasure we present short-shorts, low-cut tops, bikinis, etc.  Summertime can be tough on a guy trying to live Christlike.  The O’Kaysions made it an official pastime in 1959 with what else “Girl Watcher”

I'm a girl watcher

I'm a girl watcher

Watchin' girls go by

My, my, my

I'm a girl watcher

I'm a girl watcher

Here comes one now

Mmmm, mmm, mmm

I was just a boy

When I threw away my toys

I found a new pastime

To dwell on

Whenever I detect

Members of the other sex

I play the game I do so well, oh

I'm a girl watcher

I'm a girl watcher

Watchin' girls go by

My, my, my

I'm a girl watcher

I'm a girl watcher

Here comes one now

Hello there, female

My, my, but you do look swell

Could you please walk

A little slower

I wonder if you know

That you're putting on a show

Could you please walk

A little closer

I'm a girl watcher

I'm a girl watcher

Watchin' girls go by

My, my, my

I'm a girl watcher

I'm a girl watcher

Here comes one now

Mmm, mmm, mmm

Okay let’s get all of the rationalizations out of the way right now.

·   I’m just window-shopping.

·   God wants us to enjoy His creation.

·   I’m just looking, it’s not like I’m going to sleep with her.

·   If she didn’t want me to look she wouldn’t dress that way.

·   Looking never hurt anyone.

Now that we got that out of our system let’s take a look at King David.  2 Samuel 11:1 starts the story of David enjoying a little girl watching.  (vs. 1) Instead of being with his men David is just lounging around the palace. (vs 2) David can’t sleep so he takes a walk on the roof and there is where he got a look at naked Bathsheba.  Now I’ve always taken the philosophy even up to this point David hasn’t done anything wrong.  We’ve all seen things that we didn’t mean to see (internet pop-ups) and that’s not our fault, right?  If we’re on a risky website we certainly greaten our chance of seeing the wrong kind of pop-up.  So if we we’re where we shouldn’t be in the first place, yeah, that’s wrong.  Back to David on the roof.  Did I mention Bathsheba was naked?  It seems that part kind of stuck with David too because he sent for her.  (vs. 4)  David goes from taking a walk to sleeping with one of his general’s wife. I’ll let you read the rest of the story 2 Samuel 11:5 – 12:23.  Shall we go back to the list above?  Just looking, doesn’t hurt anyone.  Have you ever asked your wife if she feels hurt when you look at other women?  I’m guessing the answer would be YES!  Do you think she may feel like Uriah with a spear through her heart?

Again we’re only looking we’re not going to sleep with her.  Remember the statement from a famous person, “depends on what is, is”.  Sleep with her, sex, adultery that’s the line, right?  Old Testament law agrees, Leviticus 20:10 “If there is a man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, one who commits adultery with his friend’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.”  There you go, it’s the act of having sex with someone not your wife! That’s the sin!  Okay as long as we don’t take it that far we’re okay. 

Wait a minute, God wasn’t finished talking to us when Leviticus was written.  He still has plenty to say in the New Testament.  Let’s take a look at Matthew 5.  Jesus has just finished picking His disciples and a crowd starts to gather.  He goes to the mountaintop to speak to them; we know this as the “Sermon on the Mount”.  Jesus starts to reveal new teachings.  It’s not only the act but it’s also the heart attitude.  (vs.21) Jesus starts with us angry people.  “You have heard that the ancients were told ‘You shall not commit murder’”.  (vs. 22) “But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court...”  He continues to look into our hearts.  (vs 27-28) “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”  Guess what, looking is a sin too!

Guys we have to watch out for what we’re watching.  It doesn’t take long for the “and now for your viewing pleasure” attitude to care control of us and lead us down a very dark path.  The next time you think that just a look won’t hurt anyone, remember where it took David.

~Walter E. Homan

Rest

Rest has different meanings to different people.  To some it’s a get away from work to hiking, biking, paintballing or some other activity.  To others rest is laying in a hammock.  No matter what your definition, we need rest.

I have a laptop so I can be working no matter where I am.  I use a pda so I can be working no matter where I am.  I have a cell phone so I can be working no matter where I am.  Is anyone seeing a pattern here?  It’s good to be active and God commands us to work, but to what degree?  Genesis 2:2 “By the seventh day God completed His work which He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had done.”  God rested!  If I’m looking at this right, the Creator of the universe put aside His busy schedule and rested.  What are we doing that is so important that we can’t rest? 

Insert your own list here. 

Here’s mine:

·      Work at work

·      Work at building my own business

·      Work at church

·      Work on my house

·      Work at being a better dad

·      Work at being a better husband

Here’s the really sad part, this is the order that they came to my mind.  I think I have some priority issues.

Work is good.  Work provides for our families.  Work helps society.  Work helps ministries.  Work fights idle hands that would wonder into sin. 

Too much work drains us.  Too much work puts our marriages and families at risk.  Too much work puts our health at risk.  Too much work messes up our priorities.  Too much work makes us weak against Satan’s temptings.

What would happen if we didn't sleep?

A good way to understand the role of sleep is to look at what would happen if we didn't sleep. Lack of sleep has serious effects on our brain's ability to function. If you've ever pulled an all-nighter, you'll be familiar with the following after-effects: grumpiness, grogginess, irritability and forgetfulness. After just one night without sleep, concentration becomes more difficult and attention span shortens considerably.

With continued lack of sufficient sleep, the part of the brain that controls language, memory, planning and sense of time is severely affected, practically shutting down. In fact, 17 hours of sustained wakefulness leads to a decrease in performance equivalent to a blood alcohol level of 0.05% (two glasses of wine). This is the legal drink driving limit in the UK.

Research also shows that sleep-deprived individuals often have difficulty in responding to rapidly changing situations and making rational judgments. In real life situations, the consequences are grave and lack of sleep is said to have been be a contributory factor to a number of international disasters such as Exxon Valdez, Chernobyl, Three Mile Island and the Challenger shuttle explosion.

Sleep deprivation not only has a major impact on cognitive functioning but also on emotional and physical health. Disorders such as sleep apnoea which result in excessive daytime sleepiness have been linked to stress and high blood pressure. Research has also suggested that sleep loss may increase the risk of obesity because chemicals and hormones that play a key role in controlling appetite and weight gain are released during sleep.

(The Science of Sleep, BBC, http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sleep/articles/whatissleep.shtml)

I think God knocked me down a few pegs this week.  I just couldn’t function.  I ended up with a high fever and my body just shut down until I got the rest I needed to recover. 

Ecc. 5:12 “The sleep of the working man is pleasant…”

~Walter E. Homan

The Same Old Song – 2000 years later

This week we have an article written by Chaplain Jim Freed from America's Keswick.
Here is a quick description of their ministry:

America's KESWICK is a ministry that teaches and models the Victorious Christian Life message through Addiction Recovery for men and their loved ones, through Christian Conferences, Concerts, and Events, through Training and Resources, and by providing rental facilities and service to other like-minded organizations.

The Same Old Song – 2000 years later

         As you enter the fireplace room in the Colony of Mercy Addiction Recovery Ministry from the softball field, and approach the drinking fountain, you will see a beautiful painting hanging on the wall of the outcast Samaritan woman at the well spoken of in the Gospel of John, chapter 4. Her story is a familiar one, often used to teach the colony residents about the topic of Outreach, a part of their curriculum. The challenge that we as chaplains, or any bible teacher for that matter, face to interpret the Word of God in a way that is relevant to the day in which we now live. This story lends itself very well to that end.
         You see the story of the woman at the well speaks of a woman, who was considered by most people that knew her as a loser, but not by Jesus. She is a five time divorcee, living in sin, who comes out in public only when others are not likely to be around.  She is trying to satisfy a thirst that she perceives as physical. Jesus Christ knows otherwise and steers the conversation to address her spiritual need instead. The meeting occurred at a significant place, Jacob’s well, which is a documented historical site. God just seems to show up at some places more than others. When the woman realizes that she has been confronted, then blessed by the Messiah, her reaction is understandable. The bible says; The woman then left her waterpot, went her way into the city, and said to the men, "Come, see a Man who told me all things that I ever did. Could this be the Christ?" (John 4:28-29 NKJV)  The fact that she left the very thing that she was intending on using to satisfy her thirst is notable, coupled with the fact that she was compelled, not coerced to go out and tell others.
         Now let’s look at a parallel story that takes place two thousand years later, and involves a man named Eddie. Eddie is a likeable guy, but had been written off by many as a cocaine addict. Even the doctor had given Eddie less than a month to live, so he was at the end of his rope, as most men are when they arrive at the Colony of Mercy. The Colony is also is one of those historical sites where God just seems to show up. Eddie, like the woman at the well, was trying to satisfy a hunger that he didn’t understand either. The counselor at the Colony recognized the nature of Eddie’s need as spiritual, so he introduced him to Jesus Christ. When Eddie realized that he had been confronted and then blessed by the Messiah, his reaction was the same as hers two thousand years ago. Except Eddie left his crack pipe, that heonce used to satisfy his thirst, and also went out to tell others. In fact, he went all the way to the Bahamas, and began working with children at a place he affectionately refers to as an Americas Keswick for kids! Now as you can see, the result of being impacted by the Gospel of Jesus Christ is the same today as it was two thousand years ago.

         The key to understanding the application of this text is that addiction of any sort is biblically defined as idolatry. The hunger that we are trying to satisfy can only be satisfied by an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness, And my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips. (Psalms 63:5 NKJV) The woman at the well left her water pot and her endless search for sexual satisfaction. Eddie left his crack pipe. What is it that God is calling and empowering you to leave?

                                                               Chaplain Jim Freed

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Man Up Men! Live Christlike!
Walter
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Why I'm Not Getting an iPhone | Plugged In Online Up Front

I hope all of you are familiar with Plugged In.   If your not, let me give you a short bio.  Plugged In is the media wing of Focus on the Family.  They research and write reviews for movies in the theater, dvds, music, video games, etc.  Occasionally they will also write an editorial mostly on media or technology issues.

I'm on Plugged In's email list and they had a great article in it this week.

Why I'm Not Getting an iPhone | Plugged In Online Up Front by Adam R. Holz

One of my most memorable bouts with techno-lust happened in late 2005. My wife and I were visiting relatives over Thanksgiving, and a cousin's boyfriend had gotten his hands on the just-released fifth-generation iPod … the first with video capability.

"Ooooohhhhhh," I cooed. "That's cool!" Never mind that I already had an iPod of my own. This was drool-worthy. This had pictures to go with the sound. This was so much better than my so-much-smaller, so-much-less-capable and so-much-less-cool fourth-generation model.

So that Christmas I dutifully ponied up $299 to get one … for my wife. And we're still using it today, remarkably, though its battery life isn't what it used to be.

As for its supercool video feature, well, I think we downloaded exactly one video (U2's "Vertigo"). The new iPod's biggest wow-inducing factor, it turned out, was a total non-issue when it came to our real-world usage of it. In the end, it was just another iPod … and wasn't at all different, functionally, from than the one I already had.

In other words: It was nice, but it didn't complete me.

While I like tech toys as much as the next guy, and while I'm not averse to coughing up the cash if I want (need!) something badly enough, and while I'm certainly not anti-technology, and while I really do think it's even cooler than that 2005 video-enabled iPod … I'm not getting an iPhone. Or any other smartphone for that matter. And I'd like to take a few minutes to tell you why...  (Read the whole article)

I'm one of the few guys left that still doesn't have a smart phone.  I just have an old Motorola Razor.  I've wanted an iPhone for a long time but I've been waiting for Verizon to pick it up.  I'm still on the fence, but Adam's article is definitely something to consider.

________________________________________

Man Up Men! Live Christlike!
Walter
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10 ESSENTIALS FOR THOSE NEW TO RECOVERY FROM SEXUAL SIN

Hey guys, we're going to take a little different road this week.  I had a friend of mine, Jeff, ask if he could contribute an article for the newsletter and my blog.  Considering the age we live in I thought it was very well timed.  I just read an article from Paul Caughlin in an email from Focus on the Family that reminds me that we're all susceptible to the temptations of porn.  Here is a clip from that article:

"Christians aren’t immune. When surveyed, 53% of men
who attended Promise Keeper said they viewed pornography that week. 

More than 45% of Christians admit that pornography is a major problem in their home. 

An anonymous survey conducted recently by Pastors.com reported that 54% of
pastors admitted viewing porn within the last year."
Pornography and Virtual Infidelity

Jeff Fisher from porntopurity.com has a great ministry to those recovering and healing from sexual sin.  There is more info on Jeff after the article.

10 ESSENTIALS FOR THOSE NEW TO RECOVERY FROM SEXUAL SIN

I want to offer some top tips for you who are new to recovery.  These are lessons I’ve had to struggle through in my own recovery, but I find them to be universal with most guys who want freedom from sexual sin.

1.  The quicker you go to counseling the better.
Sexual sin is MUCH bigger than you.  You need wise people around you to help you process your crisis and help you go underneath the surface.  We have been acting out sexually for many reasons.  Counselors know what questions to ask and have worked with may who struggle just like you.  Break the ice on going to a counselor.  Find a Christian counselor who has training in sexual struggles.  It is money well spent!

2.  The quicker you go to a support group the better.
Second only to a counselor, a support group is the best place to find healing and victory over sexual sin.  You need to know you’re not alone.  You need other guys to walk with you in the mud.  You need to learn to come out of isolation and into real relationships.  Support groups do all that and more.

3.  Sexual struggles open the door for God to work in many areas.
At first, we think recovery is only about stopping our sexual behaviors.   But God ends up using your sexual struggles as a springboard to work on many issues in your life.  We are out of wack sexually, but also relationally, emotionally, intellectually and spiritually.  Expect God to do His good surgery in many areas of your life.

4.  Sex is not your greatest need.
One of the biggest lies we believe is that we can’t live with out sex and that sex is the highest pleasure achievable.  Our greatest needs are in other areas.  We have a deep need to know God.  We have a deep need to know others and to be known by others.  The sooner you understand that it’s not about the orgasm, the further along in recovery you’ll be.  Trust me on this one!

5.  Recovery has little to do with your outward behavior.
This is probably the biggest shocker to me.  I focused on my behaviors for decades and was counseled to do the same.  Our outward sexual behaviors are the tip of the iceburg.  The bulk of our recovery is underneath the surface.  We need healing from wounds.  We need to learn to express our emotions in a healthy way.  We need deep intimate friendships.  We need to learn to be selfless and serve others.  Stopping behaviors is relatively easy.  Healing on the inside takes much more time and effort.

6.  It’s worse than you think.
We are not the best judges of our own sexual health.  We have been blinded to our true condition.  Every sexual struggler in recovery says at some point, “I can’t believe who I used to be and what I used to do.  I was such a different person back then.”  If you’re new to recovery, you can’t see how far off course you are.  You can’t see the erosion that has taken place in your relationships and in your personal life.  Let this soak in:  Jeff tells me I am worse than I think I am. I have more to work on than I realize.

7.  Replacing lies with truth is critical to recovery.
We also can’t see the lies that we have believed.  My counselor reminds me that with every wound there is a lie that I have believed.  It’s not until you start seeing the truth that you will uncover the lies you have believed.  God’s Word will help you with this.  So will counselors, your spouse, your support group, and close friends who know your story.

8.  Work toward full disclosure.
Ooooh.  We don’t like to think about this.  But the sooner you come clean, the better.  Get the help from a counselor on how to come clean and with whom.  Those closest to you need to know.  Your spouse needs to know.  The people you have been directly involved with need to know.  Not every person needs to know every detail, but you need to quit hiding and share the truth.  When you hold onto secrets and hide you walk in the darkness.  God calls us to “walk in the light”.

9.  Pain and suffering are necessary for deep recovery.
There are no shortcuts to recovery.  There are no quick fixes.  You cannot save yourself from pain and suffering.  Breaking free from sexual sin involves challenge, hurt, brokenness, withdrawal and grieving.  You will have to suffer consequences.  You will have to see that your actions have hurt others.  Go for a deep recovery.  The only way for our recovery to go deep is if we let God push his scalpel in and scrape out all of the junk.

10. God is close and wants to bear the burden with you.
As tough as these tips are, I want you to think about this one the most.  You are not alone.  God is here.  He will help you.  He wants your recovery even more than you and He knows how to get there.  You may go through a lot of hard times, but God will always be a strong shoulder you can lean on.  He helps carry us through the toughest of times.  Be encouraged by this.

---

Jeff Fisher lives in Raleigh, NC.  He and his wife run the site www.porntopurity.com, a site designed to offer hope, encouragement and resources to those who are affected by sexual sin.  Checkout Jeff’s podcasts on I-Tunes:  Top Tips For Sexual Purity, Top Verses For Sexual Purity, and For Ministers Who Struggle.
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Man Up Men! Live Christlike!
Walter
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The Pearls

I know what’s going to happen, you guys are going to start reading this and you’ll make it to the second paragraph and figure that it’s one of those cheesy, forwarded emails, and then you’ll stop reading.  Yes, it is one of those cheesy, forwarded emails but read the whole thing. 

The Pearls

The cheerful little girl with bouncy golden curls was
almost five. Waiting with her mother at the checkout
stand, she saw them, a circle of glistening white pearls
in a pink foil box.

   "Oh mommy please, Mommy. Can I have them? Please, Mommy,
please?"

   Quickly the mother checked the back of the little foil box
and then looked back into the pleading blue eyes of her
little girl's upturned face.

   "A dollar ninety-five. That's almost $2.00. If you really
want them, I'll think of some extra chores for you and in
no time you can save enough money to buy them for
yourself. Your birthday's only a week away and you might
get another crisp dollar bill from Grandma."

   As soon as Jenny got home, she emptied her penny bank and
counted out 17 pennies. After dinner, she did more than
her share of chores and she went to the neighbor and asked
Mrs. McJames if she could pick dandelions for ten cents.
On her birthday, Grandma did give her another new dollar
bill and at last she had enough money to buy the necklace.

   Jenny loved her pearls. They made her feel dressed up and
grown up. She wore them everywhere, Sunday school,
kindergarten, even to bed. The only time she took them off
was when she went swimming or had a bubble bath. Mother
said if they got wet, they might turn her neck green.

   Jenny had a very loving daddy and every night when she was
ready for bed, he would stop whatever he was doing and
come upstairs to read her a story. One night as he
finished the story, he asked Jenny, "Do you love me?"

   "Oh yes, daddy. You know that I love you."

   "Then give me your pearls."

   "Oh, daddy, not my pearls. But you can have Princess, the
white horse from my collection, the one with the pink tail.

Remember, daddy? The one you gave me. She's my very
favorite."

   "That's okay, Honey, daddy loves you. Good night." And he
brushed her cheek with a kiss.

   About a week later, after the story time, Jenny's daddy
asked again, "Do you love me?"

   "Daddy, you know I love you."

   "Then give me your pearls."

   "Oh Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have my baby doll.

The brand new one I got for my birthday. She is beautiful and you
can have the yellow blanket that matches her sleeper."

   "That's okay. Sleep well. God bless you, little one.. Daddy
loves you."

   And as always, he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss.

   A few nights later when her daddy came in, Jenny was sitting on
her bed with her legs crossed Indian-style.

   As he came close, he noticed her chin was trembling and one
silent tear rolled down her cheek.

   "What is it, Jenny? What's the matter?"

   Jenny didn't say anything but lifted her little hand up to her
daddy. And when she opened it, there was her little pearl
necklace. With a little quiver, she finally said,
         

   "Here daddy, this is for you."

    With tears gathering in his own eyes, Jenny's daddy reached out
with one hand to take the dime store necklace, and with the
other hand he reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue
velvet case with a strand of genuine pearls and gave them to
Jenny... He had had them all the time.

   He was just waiting for her to give up the dime-store stuff so
he could give her the genuine treasure.

   So it is, with our Heavenly Father. He is waiting for us to give
up the cheap things in our lives so that he can give us beautiful treasures.

   God will never take away something without giving you something
better in its place.

My Two Cents

This was one of those forwarded emails that seem to make it rounds all over the world.  Most of the time I would scan an email like this real quick and then delete it but this one was different.  This one really made me think.

How many times have we substituted God’s best plan with our cheap plan.  Most of us have the same problem as this little girl, we’re impatient and we want instant gratification not realizing there is something better.  Look at Matthew 7:7-11.  We have completely messed this up.  Instead of ask, seek, and knock we just take what we want.  Drugs and alcohol does this by substituting the true healing of a Godly relationship with the instant numbing of the substance.  Porn, in much the same way, substitutes God’s plan of sex with airbrushed images.  It’s so easy to get caught up in what seems right; like working so many hours for our family that we never see our family.  Let’s face it; God’s plan is always better than ours.  When we jump the gun and settle for the cheap pearls we miss out on all the good things that God has for us.  In what ways are you settling for the cheap pearls because your rushing God?  What blessings are you missing out on?  Spend some time in prayer this week and ask God without a time frame in mind.

________________________________________

Man Up Men! Live Christlike!
Walter
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End Your Season Well

I read this morning and it reminded me of how we have so many eyes on us. We need to guard our integrity, temptation is all around and it takes on many shapes.

Post from:  http://www.christianitytoday.com/moi/2011/001/february/4.4.html

End Your Season Well
Theme of the week: A Hunter's Guide to Holiness
Friday, February 4, 2011

Key Bible Verse: for I want you to understand what really matters, so that you may live pure and blameless lives until the day of Christ's return. (Philippians 1:10) Dig Deeper: Philippians 1:9-11

The old fellow stood at the fence and looked longingly at the huge deer that had just jumped it. As if tempting him to shoot, the buck stood there for what seemed like forever and then ran away.

"Why didn't you take the shot, Gramps?" the young hunter asked.

The seasoned hunter remained motionless, looking toward the one that got away. Then he spoke softly. "Boy, you know me better than that. And you know very well that the land on the other side of this fence is off limits."

The grandson grew very quiet as his grandfather continued. "Young man, I've been around for a lot of years and managed to build a pretty good reputation for being on the up-and-up when it comes to following the rules. I'm not about to let an old buck tempt me into messing up now. I'm too close to the end of my season for such foolishness."

No shots were fired that day, but a great harvest took place in the boy's heart. He learned firsthand what integrity looks like. If he imitated what was personified in the life of his gramps, the young man would do well in and out of the woods.

—Steve Chapman in A Look at Life from a Deer Stand Devotional

My Response: When I am tempted to "break the rules," I will stop and evaluate the impact the decision would have on myself and others.

Thought to Apply: You must bless the church and the world by your holiness, or you will curse them both by your hypocrisy and inconsistency.—Charles Spurgeon (British preacher)

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Man Up Men! Live Christlike!
Walter
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